a rickety bridge of impossible crossing

i'm getting glasses again

Today I got my eyes checked for the first time in many years. I've worn glasses on and off since I was a kid --- I was diagnosed with astigmatism, wore glasses for a few years, was told I didn't need glasses anymore, got older, didn't have health insurance, got health insurance, got told I need glasses again, broke them, didn't have health insurance, etc...

Well now I've cycled back around to being poor enough to qualify for medicaid, so I figured I'd get checked out. My vision's never been so bad that I felt impaired, especially not now that I can easily turn the font up on everything. But as one gets older, it's sometimes prudent to get checked out, even if there's no trouble. One never knows, does one.

It turns out that physically my eyes are perfectly healthy, and my astigmatism is about the same as it's always been. This time the doctor recommended bifocals. I've never worn bifocals before; I always assumed the persistence of a second lens in my field of view would be a major distraction, but it turns out they now make "no-line" bifocals. I just look at things up close through the bottom part of the lense, and things far away through the top part.

It turns out a lot has changed since my last eye exam. The liquid they used to dilate my eyes felt like water, no sting to it at all, and my vision only got slightly blurry. I told the doctor I was worried it didn't take, but she assured me it was fine, that they use a mild solution. Every other time I've had my eyes dilated, I completely lost the ability to read for hours afterward, which is why I requested the whole day off instead of just the morning to go to my appointment. I'm glad the science has evolved.

I was all set to pick out my glasses then and there, and found a pair I liked, when I discovered that medicaid doesn't pay for glasses. That seems pretty cruel. "Oh yeah, we'll pay for the exam to find out how bad your vision is, but we won't pay for the part that actually helps you. Get fucked." The cheapest pair of glasses that fit my needs would've been about $90, which I don't think is that unreasonable in the grand scheme of things, but which I definitely don't have. I asked them to place the order on hold until I scraped up the money. Luckily Izzy was there to remind me that you can get glasses online for like $5. She was in another part of the building and met up with me as I was finishing up the appointment; it's a good thing I didn't have $90, because if I did, I probably would have paid $90 before she would've had a chance to stop me. As it is, I asked for a copy of my prescription --- they don't just give it to you, you have to specifically ask for it --- so I will now embark on the journey of online glasses buying. I don't like the idea of buying a pair without trying them on to see how they look, but I understand they have tools that let you upload a photo of your face so you get a preview of how they're going to look. What a future we live in.

Bah, now would be my chance to finally use one of those Warby Parker discount codes I heard advertised on podcasts ad nauseam for half of the last decade, but none of the podcasts I listen to are sponsored by Warby Parker anymore. At least, I assume they aren't. I skip the ads. Wait, why do I know about the discount codes? Why didn't I always skip the ads? Man, the past is truly a foreign country. Well, everyone I know uses Zenni. I should probably use that. I just hope the exchange rate is doing okay; all of my funds are still in USD 🦝

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